The ice cream was gone.
Did I mention I had a teen program that night at work? Because I did. A whole herd of teens were coming in, and I was going to do some talking. And people were going to look at me. Keep that in mind.
When I was young, I wore glasses.
My glasses were rather strong, because my family is characterized by sight problems and hearts that suddenly explode. And also pale skin (but only on Mom's side).
One of the reasons PE was so freaking hard was peripheral vision. I didn't have any.
Because my face made such good target practice, my school churned out a few college athletes, and several psychopaths*.
While losing glasses can get expensive, it was nothing like the cost of having reconstructive surgery, so life went on. Glasses offer some protection.
But not when you're 27 and hungry for ice cream.
Can you see your nose? Right now, staring at this page while you read, do you see your nose? Just a little bit, I bet. But before I mentioned it, I bet you couldn't. Because your brain filters out your nose when it interprets what you see, so you don't walk around all the time, staring at the weird bump you have that people like but you hate.
And then pain.
Blinding pain, the kind of pain that makes your eyes water. I curled over, leaning on the shelves next to the fridge. I waited for my nose to start bleeding (it didn't). I waited out the pain.
Then I opened the door again, took out some ice, stepped back super-far, and closed it.
That's right. I slammed the freezer door on my own nose.
Now, I totally lucked out. Because my nose bent sideways and TOUCHED MY CHEEK. If I had hit it higher, I think I would have broken it. Lower, there might have been cartiledge damage. But no. I was okay.
|Was this too much to ask for?|